Thursday, April 1, 2010

I Have An Oil Dream

A Well In Every Yard

Drill everywhere. Let's put an oil well for everyman in every yard, every playground, every open lot and park in the world. Let's drill drill drill. Onshore, offshore, uptown, down, city, country, desert and permafrost, let's penetrate them all with pipes and drillheads, down down down, and pump pump pump, in my wildest dream the gushers never end, the oil sands of Athabaska are infinite, and the black stuff stays cheap and plentiful forever. In this dream, each and every one of us is driving a hummer, or an 18 wheeler, at high speeds, on 24 lane mega freeways that are freedom-incarnate, government subsidized and with unlimited speeds. That's right: no speed limits. Gasoline would be a nickle a gallon and every moving thing would have dual exhausts that exude the powerful rumble of a large-block V8 engine and blow black smoke in huge clouds every time you stomp that peddle. DRILL EVERYWHERE. PUMP PUMP PUMP. Wow, I just get goosebumps!! Who's with me!! DO IT! Get up. Go drill.  

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